Still Don't Know: A Song for Tourette's

Rising star, Jenna, has seen a huge turn-around in her mental wellbeing since working with us on #Focus5. When she started on the project she was feeling isolated and upset, however, thanks to her hard work and the support of her Key Worker things are looking a lot brighter for her. You can read more about her story and how developing Tourette’s Syndrome (TS) changed her life here.

Jenna has recently written a song about TS and how it has affected her. One day she hopes to return to the studio in order record it but as today is Tourette’s Awareness Day, Jenna would like us to share the lyrics with you.

Jenna is keen to raise awareness of TS as people don’t yet understand how severe the condition can be and a lot of people tend to make fun of TS due to their ignorance; either because they find it funny, or they don’t know what TS is. So, Jenna hopes that others who suffer with TS might find comfort in the words of her song. You can read her lyrics below.


Still Don’t Know

Good heart deep inside of me. Wide sky’s bright stars all around me. Dark seas, tall waves all around me. Where do I turn, to which step do I take, it’s so hard to know where to go. Trying to find myself is impossible as I don’t know which path to take, don’t know which road to walk down. I need to know who I am.
Covered in bruises and falling down hard. Ticking like crazy and covered in scars. You look at me and think I am crazy, then you laugh, it’s not funny. Good heart, bright stars, dark seas, tall waves drowning me slowly. Good heart, bright stars, dark seas, tall waves wherever I go. And I still don’t know, and I still don’t know who I am.
Head’s hurting, ticking and I just look crazy. They stare, laugh, point and judge. Who are they to judge when they don’t even know me. They think they know me, think they know my condition, they’re wrong. People faking Tourette’s that makes me mad. I got diagnosed December 2020.
Covered in bruises and falling down hard. Ticking like crazy and covered in scars. You look at me and think I am crazy, then you laugh, it’s not funny. Good heart, bright stars, dark seas, tall waves drowning me slowly. Good heart, bright stars, dark seas, tall waves wherever I go. And I still don’t know, and I still don’t know who I am.
Look around and I still don’t know. Look around and where do I go. Look around and I still don’t know. Look around and where do I go.
Confused and I still don’t know, don’t see what’s so funny about my Tourette’s. I’m still human, still have feelings, you don’t know what it’s like to be scared to go outside. But fighting through I’ll overcome my struggles and win this battle and so you see Tourette’s is not joke. Tic attacks sound so fun but they hurt so bad, some can even break my bones, but you wouldn’t know.
Covered in bruises and falling down hard. Ticking like crazy and covered in scars. You look at me and think I am crazy, then you laugh, it’s not funny. Good heart, bright stars, dark seas, tall waves drowning me slowly. Good heart, bright stars, dark seas, tall waves wherever I go. And I still don’t know, and I still don’t know who I am.
Tics are unprodable, explosive and out of control, but you don’t know how. I hate that I don’t have control of my movement and the words that leave my mouth is something I’ve had to learn to except. But I’m all good now even thought I still don’t know myself. I’m not getting any better people just don’t care, so they laugh and stare.